There's two theories to arguing with a woman. Neither one works.Never miss a good chance to shut up.
If you find yourself in a hole, stop digging.
The best way out of a difficulty is through it.
Diplomacy is the art of saying "Nice doggie" until you can find a rock.
Timing has a lot to do with the outcome of a rain dance.
"A gun is a tool, Marion, no better or no worse than any other tool, an axe, a shovel or anything. A gun is as good or as bad as the man using it. Remember that." -- Shane
Talk slowly, think quickly.Never approach a bull from the front, a horse from the rear, or a fool from any direction.
And finally, never wear pants like this. You won't be able to sit on a horse and anyone that hits on you in a cowboy bar will be named Percy.
18 comments:
And never ever answer the question "does this make me look fat". Ever.
Don't know Bridget, from the little I've seen on this blog, you'd look pretty cute in that outfit.
...and the the only Percy I know is, A. Charming. B. Well mannered C. Well off and D. ..ok, he's a bit of ladies man, but I'm sure he'd settle down.
Three men are in a pickup truck. How do you know who's the cowboy?
Easy. The guy in the middle. He doesn't have to drive and he doesn't have to get out to open the gate.
All you need to be a cowboy is guts and a horse. And with enough guts, you can steal a horse.
All very good advice,keep up the good work.
Are those shoulders padded?
There's a reason those jeans are only $2.39......
Those jeans remind me of a comment Donald Hamilton wrote for one of his characters. One knowing a lot about woman by where her jeans ended, extra long enough to cuff, short enough to expose ankle or just right covering to the shoe leather. He believed the one that covered to shoe leather was a keeper.
Good advice!
However you left out one.
Never pick a fight with an old man. If he is too old to fight, he'll probably just kill you!
Oh yeah! I love the advertisement. I especially like the pants cuffs. That's guaranteed to bring a pile of ticks into the house with ya. Of course, that's nothing compared to the little goodies that they'll catch during branding...
I need to copy that ad, enlarge it and head for the nearest Sears to purchase/pester some clerk for those three dollar britches and two dollar denim shirts!
Clerk: “Sir, that’s not a current ad.”
Crawler: “Well I sure as hell don’t see an expiration date…do you? Look, I’ll pay full price for the bandanna and hat…?”
The cowboy…er…apple of cowboy Percy’s eye kind of resembles Elvis! Thanks for the end of the work week laugh…
Brigid -
May I print this out and hang it on the wall? And maybe pass it around via e-mail as well, with proper attribution, of course?
Fine words of wisdom, looking forward to the next batch!
I loved this post until I got to the last word. My grandfather was named Percy. (just kidding)
Good ones Brigid!
a couple of favorite suede whats!?!
:)
Shirts, I'm sure, but I couldn't resist.
If there's a low road option, you'll know where to find me ...
Suede shits??? Aren't typos grand...
For some reason this really struck me, dangit, and I had a great laugh. Best in weeks.
Thanks, Brigid!
Never squat with your spurs on.
Rey B
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