Sunday, September 18, 2011

Field Dressing

Before I had my first piece published in a magazine, I got a couple of rejections. I'm a scientist by education, not a writer, it's just the way I relax and work through things. But I thought it was as good as some of the stuff I've read out there, at least with a good editor, so I went ahead and tried. One well known outdoor magazine said my work was really, really good but "too philosophical" for them. A woman editor at another publication that had a mostly male demographic suggested I perhaps write for a fashion magazine if I wanted a wider audience.

Oh yes, fashion is MY middle name.

The best outing I've had in ages with a handsome male, I wore a ballcap. I own one dress, the cobalt blue screen of death number and the last time I wore a ball gown was some Presidential Inagural Ball thingy I got invited to. My house is decorated in "Outdoor Life" and I have more guns than shoes, so I am NOT the person to go to for fashion advice and I'm not sure how I'd write about it.

"She had been waiting, knowing her target would come, moving though the trees with certitude. She holds her gun in solemn readiness, waiting just for the perfect moment. There, between an oak and a the ditch line, was the buck. She drew in her breath, bringing up her bright and shining weapon, which coordinated perfectly with her caban coat, in quilted napa leather so soft and weightless it practically floated and her Mongolian Tapestry boots.

What was that? She looked through her chic but dark shades of Persol PO 2720S Sunglasses. The buck was almost into view, moving quietly as if simply formed out of still air. The muscle memory in her is poised to call him to her, as her finger moves towards the trigger, its touch but a final kiss.

But she hesitated, distracted by a sound above, removing her finger from the trigger guard, the Chanel lambswool glove a perfect match to her hunting ensemble. There! Overhead. A formation on the wing, the honking just saying "Canadian Goose season opened yesterday in the South
Zone". It would be a perfect shot. She is torn, undecided. Should she bag the buck that's coming into range or something in genuine 100% goose down? What's a girl to do?"

In next month's issue: Hair Accessories That Work and Stalking the Latest Fall Trends in Fur.

I don't think so. I'll stick with what I like, even if its appeal is lost to the masses.
- Love, Brigid