I seldom watch TV at home. Mostly as we got rid of ours about 5 years ago and just watch boxed sets of our favorite shows on the humongous computer monitor I have in my office/den/writer's den of brain block.But sometimes when traveling for work, I arrive back at the hotel, peruse the room service menu, and too tired to post anything of worth, consider TV. But not for long. If I watch, I do like the History Channel, NCIS, Red Green, Firefly, Top Gear and some old shows and movies, especially westerns and old classics. When I was commuting and had the crash pad I got the most basic and cheapest of cable service and only because with Internet I got a deal. So in watching that I discovered several things.
There is NO subject off limits in commercials. (Seriously, I don't want to know about the amazing merits of "Panty Shields with Wings!". Wings? Good Lord, they act like we won WWII with those things. Also, "have a nice period" Shouldn't that be changed to "vehicular manslaughter is wrong")?
If you are dead due to Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis (caused by breathing the microscopic dust of ground up yard gnomes used in older insulation) you are NOT able to call the attorney listed at the end of the commercial.
No matter what time it is and how basic your cable, on one channel will be Law and Order Special Victims Unit.
I also rediscovered why I don't watch much television.
One late nights selection:
Talk show with guest - liberal Hollywood airheaded "actress"
Zombie Strippers (wait, wasn't that just on the previous channel?)
Cindy Crawfords Skin Secrets!
Bridalplasty
Rock of Love
Murder She Wrote (look, every time Jessica Fletcher shows up at a dinner party someone gets murdered, and yet she keeps getting invited, hellooooo)
Great Horse Cleaning Tips ( Maybe that was "house cleaning", at least I hope so.)
Depression and Anxiety Help (you invited Jessica Fletcher over for beer and Brats didn't you?)
Pimp my mailbox (or some such home decorating show)
Infomercials (I've got to get one now, I've nothing to wear if Caligula comes on later) , Petty Officer Junction - (the silly other NCIS show)
BBC's "Fastest Animals on Earth (sorry folks it's still a fully grown Holstein dropped from a C-130 at 150.626 ft/sec assuming a 0.7 drag coefficient)
And of course, Home Shopping Channel:
Buy Jewelry Now!
Jewelry and You!
Jewelry to accessorize with your wearable towel!
What were/are your favorite shows? If the Internet was down tomorrow for something what would you watch? Or would you watch at all?
Love your sarcasm, but sadly, some of those are pretty close...
ReplyDeleteBridgid, I have been observing more television traveling back to my parents' house more often (we got rid of our cable years ago and only stream now). Honestly, there is not one darn thing on current television that I would watch and if the InterWeb was down, I would go without. It really is that bad - not only from any morally objectionable things I might see, but the complete lack of original ideas.
ReplyDeleteI am always intrigued with the commercials for such a wide assortment of pharmaceuticals. Included in the narration is an ever-growing list of side effects, including the glossed-over warning that use of these products, as directed or not, will probably kill you. But it's a better way to die than the product it's replacing. We live in marvelous times!
ReplyDeleteI dumped cable per se years ago, opting for Amazon Prime and whatever I can find for free on a Roku TV. This year my daughter gave me a years subscription for Britbox. Because I've watched all the episodes of my favorite shows on Amazon and the pirated ones on YouTube.
ReplyDeleteBut then there's the US things like Charlie Chan movies I wish they'd re-master.
I am not much of a TV watcher, but wifmann claims to enjoy it in the evenings...for about ten minutes and then falls asleep.
ReplyDeleteWe cut the cord (actually satellite service due to living in the boonies) about four years ago and installed an antenna for broadcast reception. We do not miss the satellite service, and actually get programs that we did not get before that we really enjoy. AND we save $100 a month!
Wifmann watches cooking shows and painting shows(the constant "happy tree" observations does wear on me).
MeTV is pretty neat in that you get all of the old westerns on Saturday (I blame my illogical craving to own a derringer on my childhood exposure to Richard Boone in "Have Gun Will Travel"). On weekdays " The Waltons" come on at noon, so we take a break and watch that together while scrounging lunch.
NCIS is something I try to catch on Tuesday nights, but often get busy and have lost track of the backstories (also still ticced off about Ziva getting booted, but I see, lately, that they are bringing her back.
I look forward to Blue Bloods, but is a on at 2200 Hrs and I often can't stay awake to catch it.
Otherwise TV is for local news weather (I don't do Notice To Airmen anymore).
The news from the major networks I avoid as I find most of the reporting slanted and often untruthful either by design or by ommision. My blood pressure suffers if wifmann watches the national evening news, so I often find something to do in my shop or go read somewhere out of earshot.
I would enjoy the History Channel, but I have a backlog of books to read to scratch that itch.
I think you would be surprised at the variety and number of broadcast channels you would get in your area. Antennas no longer require you to climb up on the roof to fine tune them. You can get a remotely contolled one pretty cheap (less than $40).
Lou Dobbs, Tucker Carlson and re-runs of All Creatures Great and Small.
ReplyDeleteMash, Fraser and most Australian shows.
ReplyDeleteHmm, having the much unloved DirecTV system, (it's cheap for us...) We tend to watch Discovery, StarzWesterns, and History channel. The only shows that are not reruns of Supernatural, Dr Who, or Star Trek(any) are Forged In Fire, Gold Derp (I mean Gold Rush), and I sorta found I liked watching Moonshiners!
ReplyDeleteThree tv sets and not one has been turned on in four years.
ReplyDeleteMy tv is the same except I have a goat skull sitting on it for lack of a better place to put it.....
DeleteI have a stack of books, so I only need background noise to drown out tinnitus. 116 cds worth of mp3s are available via laptop/speakers, so I’m good.
ReplyDeleteWe're watching the X Files these days. Bought the Blu-rays, too, so we don't have to watch the ads.
ReplyDeleteThe streaming ads were doing that thing where they listen to your phone, then show you and ad and it got creepy...
Ah yes, ads...the bane of...well, USED to be the bane of TV, but with some of the shows today, the ads are actually better...
ReplyDeleteI just want to mention that, through my library, I find free movies, TV series, audio books, and Ebooks on HOOPLA. They also offer an interesting movie/TV selection on a service called Kanopy. (There are not only many films and documentaries available, Great Courses are, too.) With the virus troubles these days, many library systems offer use of their resources merely by signing up on their web-sites.
ReplyDeleteI am reading a mystery series, set in England,Wales and Scotland. It takes place following world war I. The series is written by a talented mother,son duo. They write under the sons name, Charles Todd. If you like mysteries, they are just right in a comfy chair by a fire.
ReplyDeleteWe find some very good stuff on Amazon Prime. "Bosch" is outstanding. Also "The Americans", "Trapped" (Icelandic), "Stranger Things", and "The Expanse".
ReplyDeleteOMG! I am still laughing at this post! Yes, TV can be mindless at best! I have hulu. It took my son's help and a lot of hit and miss to learn how to use it, but I like it. I like old movies (westerns), documentaries, and old TV shows. Today's lineup of weekly sitcom just aren't my idea of entertainment.
ReplyDelete