Tuesday, July 8, 2014

Why Women Take So Long in the Bathroom In the Morning - The Truth Revealed

I have had a number of people, well, women readers who have become friends anyway, that have sent comments via email regarding my hair photo on the right sidebar f the blog and it's alleged natural beauty.

Just so you know, said picture involved a hair cut expense that would have made Congress proud, three different hair products, a round brush, a hair dryer, cursing in various languages including really bad Swedish, good lighting and 30 minutes in the bathroom.

Gentlemen, there's a reason the women in your life spend a lot of time in there. But for their loved ones, for those special occasions and the occasional internet picture, it's worth it. For yes, because we want to look nice for you, we are doing the hairstyling equivalent of photoshopping our head

For THIS is what my hair looks like when I wake up in the morning.


  1. I wish I had any kind of waves in my hair anytime. I will never be able to spend time with a round brush and products just to have a nice hairdo. I have always thought your hair picture was pretty.

  2. I see nothing wrong with the morning hair. Love the Saberliner on the desk.


  3. Ah. Cover Squirrel. I'll retreat back to the swamp now.

  4. I approach mirrors in the morning with the same expression as Abby has. Actually, I hate mirrors any time of the day.

    I know you think it's a pain, but curls/waves/wild hair is at least more interesting than having it hang there with as much enthusiasm as Abby is displaying.

  5. Erin - thanks, and you've seen me with the geek glasses on.

    Jennifer - Next Tuesday! Beer! Enchiladas!

    Linda - there are days they are perfect ringlets and there are days it looks like I was attacked by a feral possum. I always wanted to have STRAIGHT hair.

    diesel smoke- I've got almost 4000 hours in the left seat of that bird. Honestly I don't miss flying as far as the Cessna, Piper stuff at all. But I'd give a piece of anatomy I've never had to have another round of planting that bad boy on a very, very short piece of flat surface.

    Mikelaforge - understood. Stay safe over there.

    naturegirl - Just wait til you add humidity!

  6. Nothing wrong with "sleepy cute".

  7. I can tell when Mrs ERJ is getting ready to go to the hair salon: Her hair starts looking good.

    I love the "lived in" look. I love the way well worn (and cared for) clothing looks. I love the look of well lived in houses. I love the look of hair that is living life.

    You can keep that wrapped-in-cellophane, air-brushed look. I adore the hair that spent the night swooping down an icy sledding hill on a lightening fast toboggan. It may be frazzled and hat squashed...but I never notice that because of the dancing eyes beneath.

  8. Ringlets, curls, waves, anything would be great. I have straight, fine hair! As I age, it gets thinner. It is not a good look when left to its own mind. So, I have to work harder to keep it halfway decent and with some volume.

  9. Could be worse. I have two different morning looks, depending on how badly I need a haircut at the time: Einstein or Tintin.

    Yours looks fine to me!

  10. I like the morning look, go with that and get out of the bathroom!

  11. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
    Straight, wavy, curly... whatever.

    At least you HAVE hair.

    I've got 17 [I counted then] tiny hairs growing out the top of my head, that the woman who last cut my hair mousse'd so that they would be visible.

    Unruly, Independent, wild hair is just mirroring the person it's attached to.

    It looks just right.

    Rich in NC

  12. Nope, still cute. There's little you could do to be unattractive, it seems. But after 34+ years of marriage, I've learned that if you're not happy with it, my opinion isn't important. :)

  13. For what it is worth, I like your wake up hair!


  14. Balderdash! I prefer it wilder. Kim Basinger look.

  15. I think either style is beautiful ! Even your "bed head" style looks great !

  16. As a male (pushing 70) born with "naturally curly hair," I can tell you the following: Women/girls have always loved it; I have ALWAYS hated it! Over the years it developed a wave like storm surf on the North Coast!

    The only time it was ever manageable was when I kept it shaved at less than 1/8th inch, and then it got too looking like Velcro.

    These days, I keep it about 1/4 inch long, and me and my barber swap lies every two weeks or so, telling each other how handsome we are now that we're "mature!"

  17. Looks fine..
    Plus is is Red..or Ginger as my youngest red headed son says...
    Whatever that means!!

  18. Pretty fantastic. WifeV2.0 would sacrifice children to get her hair to do wavy like that and not her genetic Jew-fro in the morning.

  19. Oh, you destroyed my image of you! I have many times envied your hair (in the sidebar) and just assumed all you needed was a brush and blow dryer to make it look that great! But the other one isn't bad either. Mine stands straight up in the morning.

  20. I really look forward to humidity again LOL.

    If it didn't frizz now and then it wouldn't fluff up at all.

    I share Linda's problems with hair.

    Aside from all that, Brigid has the coolest color no matter what direction it's going in.

  21. My solution was to cut most of it off.

  22. heresolong - well thank you!

    JoeMama - your wife is a lucky women, as you know what's important. Thanks for stopping.

    Roger C - Einstein of Tin Tin. Love it!!!

    Sunnybrook - on work days I usually wear it up. I work gear, the geek glasses and my hair up I look like a completely different person.

    Rich in NC - she moussed 17 hairs? Oh dear Lord . My Dad went bald really young. I think he's really handsome and like a lot of women, find a bald head attractive as all get out. But I once got he and my Step Mom ball caps that said, respectively "Bad Hair Day" and "No Hair Day"

    Rev Paul - you are a wise man. :-)

    Idahobob - thanks!

    Mathew Paust - I'll use that as my excuse next time I let it go wild "I'm just trying to look like Kim Basinger" Not sure if anyone will buy it, but that will be my story.

    Jane - thanks my friend. The chocolate will be going out tomorrow, via UPS. Glad you wanted to share in the stash.

    Murphy AZ - I have this picture of "Velcro hair" in my brain right now and can't quit laughing.

    madmedic - it's more copper. Big Bro was strawberry blond, as is my daughter.

    Ken O - and I actually let someone talk me into a "perm" when I was a teen as they said it would give my hair more body. What a sucker. I just ended up with Brillo head. "Jew-fro", oh that is priceless!

    Sherry - unfortunately smooth and staying that way, takes some styling products ((REF of Sweden sculpting gel). I reserve that for weddings, funerals, or being up on the stand in court (hard to be taken seriously with free range hair down my back and the "sue me" pumps.

    Proudhilly - I cut my, almost to my waist, hair really short years ago to donate my hair to "locks of love" when my friend D. was battling cancer, to help someone get a wig that looked like a real head of hair. I got several comments from guys that were less than flattering and involved both my sexual preference and affinity for motorcycles, but my friends liked it.

  23. You know I ct almost all of mine off rather than deal with it... and that just means it wants to stick out at random angles, looking not unlike a tesla coil.

    I have discovered, too, that it has a superpower. Mouse, hairspray... heck, I could laminate it, and when presented with southern heat and humidity, it'll still do a great skullcap impression.

    Yours is prettier. :-)

  24. Nice CTW-6 T-39. Flew the T-47 vice the T-39 when I wen through VT-10/86 in 87/88

  25. Still looking good no matter what!

  26. I'm so behind on the blog! Your wavy hair looks great!!


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