Saturday, September 19, 2015

Talk Like a Pirate Day!

It's International Talk Like a Pirate Day!  A good day to practice cutlass malfunction drills and the 4 rules of Cutlass safety

1.  Your cutlass be always sharp.
2.  Be sure of your cutlass and what be beyond it.
3.  Keep the pointy end avast distance from yourself.
and the final one, remember ladies and gentlemen -
4.  Never let your cutlass cover something you are not willing to poke.

After a little range fun you can go home for grub cooked by your favorite Craftsman Adjustable Wench!

A word of caution to those of us who have spouses or partners.  Getting your loved one to make you dinner with:

"Avast ye scurvy weasel. Get below deck and peel me some taters fer grub!"

May be LESS than effective.

Right Abby?
So what's for supper?

Something on a plank?  (no, too predictable)
Hardtack? (no,  I got that on my last airline flight)
Kraken?  (too much like calamari)
Chum?  (no, I'm out of Chum Helper)

No, I need something I can grill on the deck.

How about Barbecued Landbird?  Mmm.  Chicken with White Barbecue Sauce.

4-5 bone in chicken pieces
1/2 cup light mayo
1 teaspoon olive oil
1/4 cup Braggs Apple Cider Vinegar
1 Tablespoon lemon juice
1 teaspoon plus 1 pinch Hot Hungarian Paprika
2 to 3 cloves garlic
3/4 teaspoon ground pepper
1  and 1/4 teaspoons  Scoville Brothers Hot Sauce (Singing Smoke variety -Yar!)

Chop the garlic and mix with all ingredients except hot sauce.  Reserve at least 1/4 cup in a mug or small bowl.  Add the hot sauce to that, stir well and store in refrigerator until ready to grill.

Marinate the chicken in the remaining sauce for 2-3 hours in a shallow pan turning once or twice during that time.  Remove chicken, discarding marinade and grill for 8-10 minutes over hot coals, (direct heat) turning once at 5 minutes so it sears but does not burn. Move the pieces on grill so they are over indirect heat and cover and cook for 18-20 minutes or until 165 degrees F., basting with reserved sauce a couple of times and turning once more if it looks like it's getting too dark before it is done.
The flavor is subtle and smokey, and the bird is as juicy as can be.

Guests may not walk the plank for it, but they will give it a hearty "ahoy!" Serve it with oven baked beans and salad (with some Gorgonzola cheese and buttermilk dressing). or your favorite side dishes. Don't forget a proper ale.   


  1. Craftsman Adjustable Wench.
    Very nice...


  2. Nice bandolier ! Did Partner make that for you?

  3. Sounds wonderful - and, for once, I'm reading before lunch.

  4. I had a talk with my son once about software piracy, whereupon he replied. "Arghhh Matey!"

  5. Tis nice to be a wench. I smoked salmon for this day.

  6. But if we are on the road during Talk Like a Pirate Day, maybe we should grab something to eat at Arrrbys?

    Later today maybe some planked and grilled zucchini? With, of course, sea salt.

    But what you cooked looks a gazillion times better than any food you could get on the road.

  7. Talk Like A Pirate Day always reminds me that Dave Barry's Sunday column went to newspaper heaven more than a decade ago. Barry was the first to publicize Sept. 19, opening the column with

    "Every now and then, some visionary individuals come along with a concept that is so original and so revolutionary that your immediate reaction is: ''Those individuals should be on medication.'"

  8. White Barbeque Sauce??? [What, no Rum?] That's different, even for a pirate.

  9. Argh! Take one day off from work, to do a little freelance bit of steel plate shooting, and totally miss the significance of the day.

    I'm going to put TLAPD on my calendar for next year.

    Can't be constantly missing it, or someone will have me be walkin the plank.


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